If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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