i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
It's no shave November. This is our time.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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