You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
