i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
