I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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