bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
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