you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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