I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
