Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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