My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I can't put those talents on a resume
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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