There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
