He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
