I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Alive.
So much puke
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
