i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
