I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Randomize
