GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
