You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize