Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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