i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
