ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
