I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
