i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
