Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
It was a blind-side dick pic.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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