haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I just blew my weed a kiss
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
