just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
