didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
he thought i was a dude.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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