I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
