the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
