Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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