Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
