Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
