"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
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