you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
