can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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