its not stalking. its research.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize