didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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