If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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