Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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