there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
