i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
