the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
