K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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