Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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