Christians are straight up FREAKS
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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