Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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