It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she smelled like a LAN party
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
