Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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