Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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