No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
