Kiss
Puke
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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