No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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