if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
